Wednesday, August 29, 2007

my attempt to name all fifty states in 5 minutes...

...because, honestly, i've got nothing better to talk about that won't send me into a panic spiral.

ok.
go!

  1. utah
  2. california
  3. oregon
  4. washington
  5. nevada
  6. idaho
  7. montana
  8. colorado
  9. new mexico
  10. arizona
  11. wyoming
  12. hawaii
  13. alaska
  14. texas
  15. massachusetts
  16. new york
  17. new hampshire
  18. new jersey
  19. north carolina
  20. south carolina
  21. rhode island
  22. georgia
  23. virginia
  24. west virginia
  25. pennsylvania
  26. connecticut
  27. delaware
  28. maryland
  29. tennessee
  30. mississippi
  31. north dakota
  32. south dakota
  33. michigan
  34. oklahoma
  35. ohio
  36. iowa
  37. missouri
  38. louisiana
  39. maine
  40. alabama
  41. arkansas
  42. wisconsin
  43. kansas
  44. illinois
  45. florida
  46. nebraska
time's up.

thanks for the break.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

opposites attract

a song from my childhood comes to mind.

"one of these things is not like the other.
one of these things just doesn't belong.
can you tell me which thing is not like the other
by the time i finish this song"

well can you?


*i swear this is the last bit of mileage i'll force from the stupid shoulder angel picture.
seriously.

sigh.
i miss having a working scanner.

last week, i spent quality time at the outdoor retailer's show.
2007.
i sat in a sad little chocolate booth that was as out of place at an outdoorsy trade show as, well, as out of place as i was.
it was a total nightmare. but the kind of total nightmare so utterly ridiculous you start laughing in your sleep and then you laugh so hard you snort really loud and you wake yourself up.
uh, hypothetically.

besides the barrage of sales reps and people in shakas not to mention the creepy sales reps at the shaka booth the only thing worth noting is my continued run ins with the 5 billion people i somehow know. how have i managed to develop a rapport with so many outdoorsy, kayaky, rock climby,
teva wearing, granola eating, jeep driving,
buck knife giving,
deer hunting,
foam shoe owning,
protein bar selling,
endorphin loving,
backpack wearing,
"man vs wild" watching,
fish killing,
early rising,
bandana wearing,
canteen drinking,
energetic
freaks?

curse my effervescent personality.

and also my ever growing knife collection. why? why??

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

it's my birthday

today is the day where i birthday it up kat style.



um... and it's also the day i promise to never say that again.


remember when i was 25?
ya... it was good times.

in fact, here are 25 very important things i did as a 25 year old.
  1. i took up jogging.
  2. i gave up jogging.
  3. i bought all the seasons of "arrested development".
  4. i lent out all the seasons of "arrested development".
  5. repeatedly.
  6. i went to the four corners.
  7. against my will i designed a "droppings" line.
  8. which became hugely popular.
  9. making me want to kill myself.
  10. i bought a pencil skirt.
  11. i threw up for the first time in 15 years.
  12. i lost 10 pounds.
  13. i feel i should mention the losing of 10 pounds and the throwing up have little to no correlation.
  14. i drank approximately 11, 680 oz of diet coke.
  15. mmm...
  16. that's about 730 pounds.
  17. i developed a new voice in my head whose sole purpose is to heckle me every sunday night while i'm feverishly trying to get my quota of ribbons tied.
  18. it's awkward.
  19. i went to disneyland.
  20. and boston.
  21. and denver.
  22. did i mention how popular the "droppings" are?
  23. seriously. i even got offered a job on saturday because of them.
  24. i met literally tens of people.
  25. i fell in love with myself all over again.
jealous?

Thursday, August 02, 2007

delicious... but deadly


my dear roommate spent 3 weeks in ghana and came home with a parasite. she's not exactly thrilled, which is why i've tried to keep the snarky comments to a minimum (and trust me i've got a million of 'em!) although i did leave a bag of "gummy parasites" outside her bedroom door for my own amusement.

but, see, then my natural curiosity drove me to do some light internet research.
which drove me to nausea.
which drove me to the grocery store to buy fiber. and a new water bottle. and nothing that could ever conceivably be undercooked.
which drove me to my own irrationale that i should avoid organic food because i need the pesticides. and also i need more diet coke, because if it can clean a toilet, it can clean my intestines.

take that tape worms. take that!!