Thursday, June 26, 2003

cheer uppage

when i'm blue there are two things i do to cheer myself up (besides having a massive chocolate binge)...
#1 i go to the pet store and play with the puppies.
#2 i go to my home ward and hang out with the youth.

i just spent three days and two nights doing #2. i'm very happyfor you see it turns out that i'm a thin, super model/ pop star, who needs neither make up nor a comb. every muscle in my back is relaxed, as i apparently need to be nurtured and massaged non stop, even while walking across the plains.
i'm also ready to collapse.
and quite frankly my neck has been rubbed raw.
i would really like to sleep for several years now. wake me up when i'm 40.

Monday, June 23, 2003

bring it

time to trek.
oh! and relax on the beach.
are you guys gonna miss me? i bet you'll miss me.

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

i'll be watching you

yesterday, blogspot was my only friend. i was bordering on obsessed, and i'm hoping that none of you have site meters. before you pass judgement on me, let me just say that i was really bored yesterday. so bored, and lazy, and migrainey that the idea of leaving my apartment caused me physical discomfort.
and also, before you start humming the police's "i'll be watching you" stalker song to me, i want you to know that i've placed restrictions on myself today.
and i also have big plans to get real friends today, even though i'll most likely talk to them in comment form ("'lol... that story made me laugh out loud. you rock my world.' posted by kat on 6/17/03 at 1:03 pm."). i hear real people can be nice too, even though they tell you that they like your "crazy hair" ("is it CRIMPED?!"), and explain that you'd be a demanding girl friend. and even though they take you away from your real friends on blogspot.
so please don't check your site meters.
trust me.

Monday, June 16, 2003

number 100 a.k.a. the worst day of my life

why? why?!?! i mean really what's the point!
i am a stupid, STUPID person.
i can't believe i thought that living in provo would be a good idea. clearly i should've stayed in salt lake! it's so clear!!
and liz, you should've stayed in salt lake with me.
hind sight is 20/20.
why do the fates conspire against me? WHY?!?!?!
i never should've quit su casa.

**ok. maybe this will help. david boreanaz went in and ate at su casa. sigh... liz's older sister waited on him. sigh...
does this make more sense now?

Saturday, June 14, 2003

it comes to this...

i've run out of things to say.
i blame summer.

Tuesday, June 10, 2003

thus endeth the blogger marathon.
how much does a man live, after all?
does he live a thousand days, or one only?
for a week, or for several centuries?
how long does a man spend dying?
what does it mean to say "for ever"?

pablo neruda
sigh... sometimes i want to go up to people who are frustrating me, grab them by the shoulders, shake them, and say, "will you just be normal?!" i think someday i will go on a shaking spree. who knows. it could be a good thing.
i think i might be growing as a person...
wait, no. i'm just hungry.
"i'm, i'm so in love with you. whatever you want to do is alright with me, cause you make me feel so brand new and i want to spend my life with you.
they say it seems, baby, that since we've been together, loving you forever is what i need. let me be the one you come running to. i'll never be untrue.
oo baby, let's, let's stay together. loving you whether, whether times are good or bad, happy or sad. whether times are good or bad, happy or sad.
why, somebody, why people will break up and turn around and make up, i just can't see. you'd never do that to me, would you baby? being around you is all i see, is what i want to do.
yes, we ought to stay together. loving you whether, whether times are good or bad, happy or sad. c'mon, let's, let's stay together."
what do you call your "hip hop" dancing when you're not "hip"?
did you know that raucous and ruckus, while very similar, are not the same word? it's true. one is pronounced rAWkus while the other is pronounced rUHkus. one means loud and boisterous, while the other one... well... pretty much means the same thing. but they are NOT the same word. raucous... and ruckus... ya... i don't care either.
"as i emerged from my bath daniel was lying on the bed giggling, 'i've got a new diet for you,' he said.
'so you do think i'm fat.'
'ok, this is it. it's very simple. all you do is not eat any food which you have to pay for. so at the start o the diet you're a bit porky and no one asks you out to dinner. then you lose weight and get a bit leggy... and people start taking you out for meals. so thne you put a few pounds on, the invitations trail off and you start losing weight again.'"
bridget jones's diary
do you think moths can be trained? since these moths insist on remaining in my apartment, they could at least learn how to fetch.
oh shoot. a shameful memory from my less self assured past. one time on oprah a top model scout explained that only cute, little, turned up noses were acceptable. so every night before i fell asleep i would do nose exercizes. i did them for about 8 months. sadly, all my hard work was in vain. my nose refused to be cute, little, and turned up. and thus we see what is to blame for my lack of super modeldom. i know. it's very sad.
oh! i also used to pull my hair at night because i thought it would make it grow faster.
"in each of life's events we have emotions, thoughts, desires, and eventually actions. it is the expression of that process that we call self revelation."
it's probably wrong of me to always need "self revelation" from everyone. i'm bad at it myself. but i'm working on it. really.
it's blogger MARATHON day!!!!
come spend a day in kat's head...

i know this is random, but last night someone said something that reminded me of an article i read about meekness. the spanish translation of meek is "manso". something which is manso isn't unassertive or placid, but obedient and fearless. last night i remembered that i would like to be manso, "strong, enthusiastic, talented, spirited, zealous." quick to do what i should. ya. that would be pretty great.

Monday, June 09, 2003

the truth hurts

let's say that you are taking a nap.
and let's say that you wake up.
and you go to fhe.
and everyone is really nice to you.
and they ask how you are doing.
and then you say that you are "good".
and then they say, "no... really. you can tell me."
and so you think everyone really really cares about you.
and then let's say that you look in the mirror.
and you see your red eyes and smeared make up.
and then you know the truth.

Friday, June 06, 2003

so here's the thing...

...i think i'm hung over.

Thursday, June 05, 2003


dear guardian angel,
i think your job would be a lot easier if you didn't have to deal with my whiney, irrational mood today. here are a few simple things you could do to get me back into my usual cheerful form...
please stop christina aguillera from blaring over the pool intercom about how she is beautiful no matter what i say.
coerce somebody somewhere to answer a phone so that i can buy a ticket to see the foo fighters tonight.
give me two excedrin and jumbo sized mountain dew.
let me win the bonnet battle with my mom.
i swear, if you help me through this i'll never ask for anything again.
love, kat.
p.s. i know i just said that thing about never asking for anything again, but if you could somehow send christian bale to my doorstep i'd really appreciate it.
p.p.s. oh! and i'd also really like a job.
p.p.p.s. and the ability to fly.

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

kat's picks for 2003

best veggie pizza EVER!!!: pizza pipeline
best ice cream creation: the chocolate blast
best musical: "singing in the rain"
best quote of the week: "that waiter spells his name 'rian' with an 'i'... that really bugs me."
best pet: sadie
best recent pop release: "miss independent"

Monday, June 02, 2003

i quit

to: the guy who started kissing the picture of me wearing a blonde wig...
although i appreciate your support, at this point in my life i see your actions not as a compliment but as encouragement to remain a brunette.

to: the not-so-young man who said he could only think of two nice things to say about me...
wow. that's twice as many as i can say about you.

to: the person who repeatedly groped me at the pool during a friendly game of "power ball"...
that's not what i meant when i said it was a "full contact sport".

to: the man driving the very nice, very loud motorcycle very fast, who took the time as he was passing my car to give me the upward nod...
wear a helmut.

to: the guy who said that hating me was so last year...
bite me.

to: the young man who was supposed to have moved to idaho but instead quit his band, bought a dirt bike, remained in orem, and tried to visit me the other day...
thank you for your phone call. you can't imagine how much i enjoy our monthly talks about you. but before you call me next month, i was just wondering if maybe you cared a little bit about how i'm doing. no? hmmm... maybe next month you should just call yourself and leave me out of it.