Wednesday, September 24, 2008

stick with what you know

the best thing about working where i do is all the free advice i get from seasoned graphic designers. wait, did i say "graphic designers"? i meant seasoned "pains in my neck".
just kidding.
i meant seasoned "people who put candy in 10 ounce bags".

i get a lot of "that's ugly." and "why are you putting those colors together? that's ugly." and "why does this santa look like it's on crack? he's ugly."
and a lot of "i don't like that"s.
not exactly constructive, but that's fine. go ahead and speak your piece.
and then please go away.
i would like to respond to one semi-valid piece of advice, "why do all your icons look so tired and sad? you should make them smile."
my response is no, no i should not force my icons to smile because when i cave in and try and cater to the "smiley" demographic, i end up with this...

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

free candy

good news, people.
the company website is finally up. finally.
and i think it deserves one more. finally.

in celebration, we're doing a giveaway on kar achoc olates.blo some time today and i'm risking my private blog anonymity because the give away is this...

and since our website is new and our blog is new and has maybe ten hits a day, there's a really good chance you could win this.
um... that's all.

p.s. you don't have to live in utah.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

field time

once, not long ago, this one batman movie came out.
uuhhhm, the end.

good story, right?

these little high school girls were swooning over a certain christian bale the other day and i felt very strongly that no, no they do not love christian bale. they cannot love christian bale because they don't know him like i and the women (yikes) of my generation (yikes x 2) know him. they did not sing along wholeheartedly to "santa fe" on their walkman. they didn't, as an 11 year old, watch "empire of the sun" also known as two and a half hours of world war 2 prison camps and john malkovich. and they didn't spend the last hour of "little women" screaming "idiot!" every time winona rider appeared on screen. they haven't logged the field time (gibberish?).
go talk to your zac efron poster, girlies. him you can have.

i now know how my mother felt when i watched "the sting" and thought i was in love with robert redford.

i now know how my grandmother felt when i watched "philadelphia story" and thought i was in love with cary grant. and then with jimmy stewart. and then cary grant.

i do not now know how my father felt when i watched "james bond" and told him sean connery was hot.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


just keepin' it really real here at ye olde candy factory.

a few weeks ago my best friend go married, and it was lovely. i've tried to blog about it maybe 7 times and each time it has quickly degenerated into a full on deluge of sap. and we can't have that because while i accept that those sticky sweet layers are there (from my head to my feet) i prefer not to put them down in writing. i will tell you that i was preoccupied the whole weekend with what i had to do next. those layers are also very much there. i was way more preoccupied than "in the moment" which isn't to say i didn't have a good time, or even that i was stressed. i wasn't. i was preoccupied. it wasn't until i was actually on the plane, in the air, headed home, waiting for my free half of a beverage that i took a deep breath and let the hugeness of the weekend hit me. that is when i looked down at my bridesmaid's bouquet and thought, "she looked so beautiful"... and burst into tears.
of sap. with just a hint of crazy.
the flight attendant walked by, saw my bouquet and my tears and said, "oh my gosh! did you just get married??"
i looked at the two empty seats next to me, then up at him, "you think i just got married?"
"you didn't?"
"there's no groom with me."
"well, you never know."
and he gave me my half of a diet coke and an extra napkin because i'd started crying again. this time because i'd been jilted at my own nonexistent wedding.

but that's not the story i wanted to tell you.
i want to tell you a little story about how i never have a normal airport shuttle experience. it's always overly complicated and the drivers are borderline crazy and sometimes i'm forced to make small talk about a baseball team i've never heard of and sometimes i get yelled at because i'm a polygamist wife a.k.a. mormon and sometimes the driver keeps referring to himself as "double 0 seven"...

this is one of those stories.

on my way to the airport to go home, it wasn't just me and mick ("like mick jager") the shuttle driver from yugoslavia. there was also a little man with a mustache.
man with mustache: hello.
me: hiya.
m w/ m: are you travelling?
me: ...[quick check to make sure i am in fact in an airport shuttle] yes. ... are you travelling?
m w/ m: why yes, yes i am. i am on my way to the airport to fly back to oregon.
me: right on. what did you do while you were out here?
m w/ m: i attended a convention on the bahai faith.
me: what is the bahai faith?
m w/ m: [i'm not going to go there, because it was weird. if you, like myself, have never heard of the bahai faith, i suggest you go here where it's much more clear.]
me: sounds awesome.
m w/ m who goes to bahai conventions: where are you travelling to?
me: i'm on my way home. to salt lake city.
bahai: what time is your flight?
me: 7:30.
bahai: my flight takes off at 7:01 and the shuttle picked me up at 4:30 and then it picked you up at 5:00 and i have not had the chance to eat and my friend mick here has so kindly agreed to let me stop and get something to eat if it is all right with you.
me: ... i guess that's okay.

so mick drove us to a jack-in-the-box where he and bahai went in and ate. they offered to buy me something, but i'd just eaten and frankly i was terrified so for the next 20 minutes i sat alone in the shuttle trying to read my book while a few 14 year old boys in the parking lot mooned me. bahai did, at one point, run out to the shuttle to give me the small beverage he'd bought for me. as he closed the shuttle door and ran back inside to finish his hamburger with mick, the song "eye of the tiger" started playing on the radio.

and that's when i realized that bahai was right, there is a god.
up in heaven.
laughing at me

Monday, September 08, 2008

diary of woman with migraine

rejnehjaiaiaiaiain jmn


Tuesday, September 02, 2008


about a month ago i was talking to my future husband who was visiting from boise (and i was also plugging my ears and rocking back and forth whenever the waiters at olive garden would sing their plucky birthday song to some poor, unsuspecting customer who just wanted some free cake already! cute-cutesy birthday songs are really high up on my soul-shuddery pet peeves list.) about how much he misses me and how pretty i am and how living in montana for 3 years was a huge mistake due to montana being the lamest state ever invented.

yes, that is how the conversation went.

there was more to the conversation of course, like how i am mystified as to how people who are no longer in school meet, you know, other people.
i've actually brought up this topic of conversation a lot with people in the last month because i have this feeling there's an obvious answer and i'm just not that smart. during this particular conversation, splincoln brought up his recent joining of the young professionals group in his area and it actually made me think, "hu. that is BRILLIANT." i'm young. i'm, you know, professional. ish. i should check this sucker out.

but after a brief browsing of the activities on salt lake's version, i realized something.
i'm not active.
so here's what i'm thinking. i just have to start a young inactive professionals type group and i'm golden. we could do stuff like get together once a week and watch "30 rock". or sit quietly and finally finish the book we started a month ago.
or go to farmer's market like we've been meaning to do all summer.
or finally go see the new batman movie. and iron man. and the hulk. and even the sisterhood of the travelling pants. 2.
or do laundry.
or go shopping for a new pair of jeans that doesn't have to be kept up with a safety pin and the belt i stole from em 4 years ago.
or unpack from my weekend in san diego.
or go grocery shopping because i ran out of paper towels and it's becoming a problem.

this may have turned into my to-do list.
which i guess, if i could find it, would be the perfect group for me to join.

i've got so much stuff to do.