failure
i don't fail. and i don't mean that in an "i'm so brilliant and talented" kind of way. actually, i should probably phrase it this way instead: i don't know how to fail.
i don't do things that i'm bad at. if i think i might fail, i don't try.
this is something that i've tried to confront in the last few years. i have forced myself to try things even though i might not be good at them. and it's been a really, really good thing because i've realized that for the most part, it's okay to be mediocre.
it's also been good for me because i've realized that when i put in the effort, even though i'm not brilliant, i rarely fail. having to put effort into something isn't a sign of weakness.
and i wish i'd learned this a long time ago.
BUT i've been doing my final round of paralegalness, which involves 5 mega tests. i've been putting in the effort and studying and trying... and there's a pretty good chance that i'm failing. i won't know for a couple of months, so i'm in this weird, freak out place. i'm only halfway through the testing, i feel like i'm not passing, all of my instincts are telling me to give up. and in the back of my mind i'm actually kind of curious to see what i'll do if i finally have to deal with failing at something big.
i don't do things that i'm bad at. if i think i might fail, i don't try.
this is something that i've tried to confront in the last few years. i have forced myself to try things even though i might not be good at them. and it's been a really, really good thing because i've realized that for the most part, it's okay to be mediocre.
it's also been good for me because i've realized that when i put in the effort, even though i'm not brilliant, i rarely fail. having to put effort into something isn't a sign of weakness.
and i wish i'd learned this a long time ago.
BUT i've been doing my final round of paralegalness, which involves 5 mega tests. i've been putting in the effort and studying and trying... and there's a pretty good chance that i'm failing. i won't know for a couple of months, so i'm in this weird, freak out place. i'm only halfway through the testing, i feel like i'm not passing, all of my instincts are telling me to give up. and in the back of my mind i'm actually kind of curious to see what i'll do if i finally have to deal with failing at something big.
Comments