Good... And Good for You

okay. let's look past the fact that the song "mack the knife" has been stuck in my head all day for no apparent reason. the truth of the matter is that i'm losing my mind. my mom made the good point last night that this at least proves i once had one. point well taken. but it doesn't change my point. that i'm going mad. i saw this old movie once where this guy decides to make his wife think she's going crazy so he can have her commited and get control of her inheritance, so he secretly moves things and steals things and acts generally treacherous and moustache twirly. and the same thing's happening to me. except i don't have an inheritance. or a husband with a twirly moustache. but my stuff keeps on disapearing and either i'm crazy, or someone out there is plotting against me. or i need to clean my room.

some songs that describe me today: uno "basket case" green day dos "under pressure" queen featuring david bowie tres "help" the beatles songs that do not describe me today: un "free at last" g love deux "hard knock life" jay z trois "oklahoma" from the musical "oklahoma" some actors i'm worried about because i haven't heard anything about them lately: ichi the former stars of the acclaimed kids show "today's special" ni dr. greene from "e.r." a.k.a. goose from "top gun" san christian slater some things that sound really good right now: men men twee pretzelmaker's salty, buttery pretzel with cream cheese drie some diet freaking coke!

sorry, i don't usually do this* but does this thrill anyone else? it's like when the flip cell phone first came out and i was all "finally! my own communication device. now if i could only afford a tricorder ..." except in this case i'm picturing isaac asimov... ...doing a mighty tap dancing number in the after life while singing, "remember the three laws of robotics everyone! la la la" while michael crichton glowers in his mansion yelling, "when will it be my turn? when? when?? when will disneyland open their 'it's a cretaceous world after all' ride? gaaa!" *link to "news" articles. *comment on "news" articles. *write two blogs in the same day.

part 9,181 the one where there's a lot of love but too many good intentions. madre: okay, i'll admit it. i really want grandchildren. me: no kidding. padre: do you date at all, kathryn? me: no. padre: not at all ? me: no padre: ... well, i don't get that at all. madre: listen, i'll admit it. i want grandchildren. me: okay. grandma: [ walking into living room with an orange shirt ] you left this here. me: i did? grandma: yes. me: when? grandma: a few years ago. do you want it? me: ...no. grandma: you don't want it? me: no. grandma: why not? me: it's orange. grandma: ... me: and two sizes too small. grandma: i'm trying to clean out my house before i die. [ sighs and walks out of room ] padre: don't the boys ask you on dates? me: no. padre: no ? me: no. padre: they're probaby intimidated. me: ...yes i'm sure that's it. madre: okay, okay ! i admit it. i want grandchildren. me: good for you. grandma: [ walks into living room with pair of pants ] d...

reasons i've thought of to include in my "i quit" speech that didn't involve the phrase, "every day i lose another piece of my SOUL !"... 0 days since i combed my hair... 11 blisters from tying ribbon... 2 times i've listened to queen's "i want to break free"... 20 billion 'tis the frickin' season.

having encountered a handful of people in the last month who neither respect the true infamy of the 80's james spader nor seem to have even the basic knowledge of a little movie i like to call "pretty in pink", i now feel it is my duty to present my favorite scene from said movie... oh duckie.

yes, it's true. at the dance party saturday night i did in fact slap a small asian girl. but it was accidental, and she was not in my line of vision, and i apologized profusely when it happened and also 20 minutes later when i accidentally rammed into her during a particularly vigorous running man experience. sadly it's also true that i refrained from slapping the little punk in the beanie who decided he hated me. college boys.