"death by christmas shopping"

that's what the coroner is going to say when i am found DEAD. it's terrifying to go out in the chaos. i've tried to do most of my shopping online, but you know that sooner or later, you have to change out of your pajamas, and go out. i went to walmart the other day to buy wrapping paper and a candle. let me tell you about the courage that i found hidden deep within me. i think that walmart's aisles get progressively narrower, especially around christmas time. little aisles plus big shopping carts equals a battle to the death. i don't know how i survived. children were being thrown everywhere, old people were moving unnaturally fast, and everyone had this look in their eye. a mixture of extreme desperation and hunger. but i went into the depths of walmart, and fought for the wrapped paper, and came out only slightly mangled. next year i'm not going to buy presents, i'm just going to give cash.