set up

"kat, there's someone we have to set you up with. he's such a great guy. tall. 26 going on 27. just the nicest, smartest guy. the elder's quorum president in his ward. goofy and fun loving... we have to make this happen."

and the whole time this conversation is going on, all i can hear is the voice in my head yelling, "what's wrong with him??"
.
.
.
well, i don't think i'm cynical.
what's the opposite of delusional?
because that's what i think i am.
come one, if that description was completely accurate, this guy would be married to mrs. perfect herself instead of being set up with ms. quirky a.k.a ms. "i got in a fight with the drive thru guy at wendy's last week" a.k.a me.

there had to've been items omitted from that description. i'm sure the director's cut would have been much longer.
and would've included the part where he's afraid of commitment. and maybe has a clubbed foot.

listen, there are reasons why i'm single. i admit it. real reasons that have nothing to do with not meeting "the right one". i'm a control freak. i have a weird sense of humor. i'm an amazon. i'm strangely competitive...
so just tell me straight up what i'm dealing with and i'll probably be okay with it.

maybe he just moved here from a small european country where height and a sense of humor are deemed undesirable.
or maybe he looks like don knotts.
or maybe he's a mime.

Comments

kat said…
or maybe he always has something stuck in his teeth.
barnesanova said…
don knotts to ben stiller... go!
Kimberly said…
OR maybe he just hasn't met the right one yet. I know a guy who (in my opinion) is practically perfect, but is still unmarried. It happens.

Who is setting you up? If he's cool, send him my way. ;)
Nama said…
...or maybe he IS don knotts?
Em said…
or he's really fat with a crater face with an affinity for insects...
Ann-Marie said…
or he's a gremlin in disguise!
Ben said…
Don Knotts to Peter Falk in It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World.
Peter Falk to Cary Elwes in Princess Bride.
Cary Elwes to Mel Brooks in Robin Hood:Men in Tights.
Mel Brooks to Madeline Kahn in Young Frankenstein.
Madeline Kahn to Barbra Streisand in What's Up Doc?
Barbra to Ben Stiller in Meet the [F-Word].

Maybe not everyone who's older required horrible-ness to remain unmarried. How else do you explain me? :)
Heather said…
Or maybe he's just been emotionally distant since his last set up.

Because she looked like Don Knotts.
And was a mime.