end it
i have a bad habit of reading the msn articles from the sidebar of hotmail.com even though i know they will undoubtedly suck.
i'm so weak.
but today's sidebar had no effect on me whatsoever because i already know all the "great ways to end a date", thank you very much.
you're talking to the world's most experienced date ender.
there's the old "i have to give my sister a ride to work reeeally early tomorrow" line.
or the "i just had my dog euthanized and i'm about to start crying" line.
but if you ask me, "lines" are for amateurs.
the truly great ways to end a date take absolute commitment to the art of dating pariahnism.
choking on a piece of orange chicken and having to self administer the heimlech.
remembering to wear the newly purchased sheer shirt, but forgetting to wear a bra.
pretending to fall asleep.
really falling asleep.
sobbing uncontrollably in the middle of "borne identity"...
seriously? the hotmail.com sidebar should be getting date ending advice from me.
i'm so weak.
but today's sidebar had no effect on me whatsoever because i already know all the "great ways to end a date", thank you very much.
you're talking to the world's most experienced date ender.
there's the old "i have to give my sister a ride to work reeeally early tomorrow" line.
or the "i just had my dog euthanized and i'm about to start crying" line.
but if you ask me, "lines" are for amateurs.
the truly great ways to end a date take absolute commitment to the art of dating pariahnism.
choking on a piece of orange chicken and having to self administer the heimlech.
remembering to wear the newly purchased sheer shirt, but forgetting to wear a bra.
pretending to fall asleep.
really falling asleep.
sobbing uncontrollably in the middle of "borne identity"...
seriously? the hotmail.com sidebar should be getting date ending advice from me.
Comments
Have you really done that? *looks incredulous*
You could be the John Madden of dating, minus 700 pounds and the fear of air travel.