hellbound

this statement is not meant to incense, but in the spirit of being completely frank (no pun intended (although at this point you probably don't know what it is i'd be punning about (sigh...) so, um, sorry about that. if you are (for some reason) re-reading this, there was no pun intended)) i do not like "it's a wonderful life".
in fact i don't like frank capra films. the whole capra-corny oeuvre.
i enjoy a feel good film as much as the next person. i enjoy films with flat, static heroes and villains. i love them. i would marry them if woman and cinema were allowed to wed. but that is because people don't take them seriously. i've never met someone who said, "'princess diaries' is a great representation of what life should be."

george bailey is a pansy.
and a whiner.

but whatever. who cares what i think.

because i'm pretty sure i'm bound for hell.
sad to say.

five-ish years ago there was this guy who fancied himself beckhamesque, except prettier and better at soccer. this was a person who didn't understand why he was red carded during an intramural soccer game for purposefully kicking a girl on the opposing team in the knee and who, one day, in a moment of epiphany proclaimed, "it's okay to be mean to fat people... unless they have a glandular problem."

he was an idiot.
obviously.

a few days ago i sat on my couch. confounded. with my hand covering my mouth.
i've been forced into a social sphere i do not like. getting to know people who aren't what you would call smart. or interesting.
or sane.
but on my couch i was given a brief history of all these people and i was right, they aren't smart.
or sane.
but they are interesting.
they have back stories involving getting hit by cars.
being depleted of oxygen as babies.
brain tumors.
mothers following them out to college.
being sent to a crazy, underground religious high school.
personality disorders.
heroin addictions.

i was riveted. my displeasure melted as this year's snow in the recent and delicious warm weather and i sat agog, listening to more and more stories of intrigue and heartbreak and that's when it hit me...

i believe that it's okay to be mean to stupid people... unless they have a mental disability.

thus.
i'm hellbound.

Comments

Andrew H said…
I'm definitely an Anti-Stupidite. And Anti-Can'tDriveARoundABoutite.
matt said…
i sold my soul on ebay.
Nama said…
...and i bought it.

MWHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Spliz said…
You can be mean to whoever you want, but WHAT THE HELL, you don't like George Bailey?

I am reevaluating our friendship.
Leah said…
I'm proud of you. It takes a lot of courage to out yourself. I'm a closet stupid hater myself.