a cautionary tale

i lie. i lie all the time.
i found out i was a dirty rotten liar during the brunt of twentyishness when i lived with spliz and wee em. one day spliz came home and announced she had "accidentally lied" to which wee em and i rolled our eyes and said something snarky because seriously how do you "accidentally" lie to someone... oh wait... i do it all the time.

i was working late last wednesday and one of the very nice, very overworked kids from the back wandered up to my office to say hi and how was i doing and guess what. "what?"
"i brought something for you today. it's in my car."
he disappeared and came back with a cheesecake. an exquisite new york cheesecake he had made from scratch.
"wow", said i.
wow indeed, for i hate cheesecake. i am repulsed by cheesecake. it makes me sick and i have this quirk where i don't like to eat stuff that makes me want to vomit.
unless it has chocolate in it.
but see, let's go back a little further (farther?) to a few weeks ago when i was chatting with nice, overworked kid and since his chats tend to run especially lengthy i was also working on some sort of nondescript designy thing. it wasn't until he left my office that i processed our conversation.
he had said he liked to cook, i'd said then why hadn't he made me lunch.
he'd said he was really into making cheesecakes, i'd said then why hadn't he made me one for lunch.
he'd said we should have a weekly cheesecake wednesday, i'd said brilliant!, but where was my lunch.

sidenote: i'm super charming.

i always get nervous when i accidentally lie because karma has a knack for getting even with me when i do.
last week karma made me eat a HUGE slice of "humble pie".

Comments

Leah said…
Ha ha! Karma.
Lincoln said…
So all those times you said you loved me....were you lying?
Anonymous said…
You should turn your cheesecake wednesdays into finer things club (if you watch The Office). Also, make him eat something he doesn't like: "MMmmmm, I made you this liver casserole from scratch..."
Spliz said…
VINDICATED!
at last.
Nama said…
mmm...cheesecake...
Fat eSpence said…
Karma? Martino? Does she make good pie?
Heather said…
Kat, I really wanted the overworked kid to be Billy Walker, and I really wanted it to be diabetic cheesecake, because I can attest that his diabetic cheesecake can heal your soul!
Em said…
You LIED??? Kathryn, I'm shocked!!!
john said…
Cheesecake makes me sick, too, so I avoid it like the plague. And since I feel like I have the plague shortly after eating it, it really isn't that hard to do.
matt said…
i guess now i have to come up with a different christmas present...
Annegirl said…
hahaha! Pull up a fork, Kat. There's plenty of room at the table, dang it.