dear friends, family, and friends of family,

i feel compelled to ask a favor of you. i don't particularly want to do it via blog because of the potential for tacky but i also don't want to call everyone up either because when i'm interrupted mid rant i'll probably say something like, "um, i believe i had the floor" and whoever i'm talking to will be like "what is this, a phone philibuster?" and i'll be like "i did not yield the floor for a question!" and then i'll get hung up on.
so, let's get started with a confession.

i hate christmas.

exhale saying that felt really good.
as a kid i'm sure i liked christmas because of the toys and the decorations and the lack of school, but there are some things from christmas past i think back to and cringe over. so in retrospect, i don't know that i was ever all that into the season.

as an adult- an adult with a job at a holiday dependent company (there used to be a very long rant here about work but i deleted it and you are welcome). and a budget. and family of old people who "don't want anything" for christmas because they're "going to die any minute now" probably while they're shoveling their sidewalk at six in the morning because they are CRAZY and won't wait for me to wake up even though i'm totally willing to do it i'm just not a morning person.
inhale
yes, as an adult- i hate christmas.

and really, when it comes down to it, there is nothing i want or need. or even want to need. nothing. except for that one seemingly unattainable thing i've wanted for ever so long. i want to not stress over christmas. i want to spend the two pre-christmas days i have after work finally cools off NOT running around like a crazy person.
which is why i'm trying something new this year.
i'm not buying any christmas presents this year. i don't want to. sorry, but i really dislike christmas shopping. plus i'm bad at it. i figured out how much i spend on christmas presents every year and this year i'm taking that money and giving half to primary children's hospital and half to best friends animal rescue and i'm calling it good. i wish i was doing it out of altruism and a wish for peace on earth. because that would be cool. but i'm not that person.
i know it.
you know it.
and i know you know it.

now- family. friends. and family of friends. -for the favor.
first of all, please don't buy me a present this year because it will make me feel like a jerk when i'm like, "wow thanks for the awesome gift you so thoughtfully and painstakingly bought for me... a donation has been made in your name to the children and animals... so... um... did is suddenly get awkward in here?"
and secondly, please cut me some slack. if i seem like a whiner or a procrastinator or a humbug, well, then my attempts at keeping things real have worked. i get that i'm being selfish about this and i should be able to rise above the stress of the season like everyone else to show my loved ones i'm thinking about them, but i'm hoping you won't really mind and you'll take the money you would have spent on me and buy yourself something great. then if you want, take a picture of it and send the picture to me with the message, "a donation has been made in your name to my awesomeness."

which you have to admit is a great idea for a christmas present.

thanks for understanding,
kat

p.s.