thanksgiving 2006: adventures in gluttony... and also sloth
MEMO
FROM THE DESKTOP OF KAT
RE: THANKSGIVING
Dear Every/Anyone,
Kat wishes she could write to you today. Unfortunately she's in bed with a "yam related hangover" (her words, not mine). Okay, honestly? She's laying in bed watching the movie "Cocoon" and eating chocolate chip cookies. When I reminded her about writing a blog she said, and I quote, "Those suckers wouldn't know a good blog if it punched them in the kidneys".
So we've compromised. Everytime Steve Guttenberg comes on screen, Kat dictates a part of this blog for me to type which basically means she mumbles something nonsensical and then laughs hysterically.
For example, she's now saying something about her burgeoning love of Jason Bateman. I don't even know where that came from. I asked her for some context and she just yelled, "MY LOVE WILL NOT BE DENIED!!" so I'm going to let her do her thing and assume she's talking about "Arrested Development". You know, it's a shame such a delightful show was cancelled because it contained serious levels of hillarity. I'd have to say my favorite character is George Michael. I firmly believe his reactions are even funnier than... hu... well, according to Kat, I suck. And yes, she made sure I put that in.
Um, now she's rambling on about her knife collection. Something about how she needs to find a nice display case... and "knife polish" apparently. In my oppinion, a knife collection is made up of more than three knives (especially when one of the three knives is a pocket knife), but she's very insistent about her incipient, although purely accidental, knife collection so I'm going to let her win this one. Besides, if she continues to accumulate "crazy non cousin" donated weaponry at the current rate, she'll have a verifiable collection in no time. But I am not buying her a display case. No matter how many pocket knife/laser pointers she's given. Because it's just weird.
Wow. Okay, now she's in this, I don't know how else to describe it, like, waking coma. I waved my hand in front of her face and she didn't even respond. Maybe this is a really good part of "Cocoon". I don't know. The old people are acting young, is that the good part? I guess now that I have you all to myself there are a few things I've been wanting to talk about. All through college and in my post grad work I studied socioeconomic factors' correlation to international enmity, I even wrote my thesis on it, and I've put together a basic, three point plan to help move us towards world peace. First, we simply need to... sigh... Kat says, "OLD PEOPLE RULE!"
I give up. I'm going to turn on my ipod and pretend I'm typing. dkeiwoapkdfcnndie djdhsiuewhwioemcniwpqbbvmguheyqpghdsklaiejdhfnbcmwifhaksjheuvoakjehcbc
Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving,
Kat's Coadjutant a.k.a La Assistante
FROM THE DESKTOP OF KAT
RE: THANKSGIVING
Dear Every/Anyone,
Kat wishes she could write to you today. Unfortunately she's in bed with a "yam related hangover" (her words, not mine). Okay, honestly? She's laying in bed watching the movie "Cocoon" and eating chocolate chip cookies. When I reminded her about writing a blog she said, and I quote, "Those suckers wouldn't know a good blog if it punched them in the kidneys".
So we've compromised. Everytime Steve Guttenberg comes on screen, Kat dictates a part of this blog for me to type which basically means she mumbles something nonsensical and then laughs hysterically.
For example, she's now saying something about her burgeoning love of Jason Bateman. I don't even know where that came from. I asked her for some context and she just yelled, "MY LOVE WILL NOT BE DENIED!!" so I'm going to let her do her thing and assume she's talking about "Arrested Development". You know, it's a shame such a delightful show was cancelled because it contained serious levels of hillarity. I'd have to say my favorite character is George Michael. I firmly believe his reactions are even funnier than... hu... well, according to Kat, I suck. And yes, she made sure I put that in.
Um, now she's rambling on about her knife collection. Something about how she needs to find a nice display case... and "knife polish" apparently. In my oppinion, a knife collection is made up of more than three knives (especially when one of the three knives is a pocket knife), but she's very insistent about her incipient, although purely accidental, knife collection so I'm going to let her win this one. Besides, if she continues to accumulate "crazy non cousin" donated weaponry at the current rate, she'll have a verifiable collection in no time. But I am not buying her a display case. No matter how many pocket knife/laser pointers she's given. Because it's just weird.
Wow. Okay, now she's in this, I don't know how else to describe it, like, waking coma. I waved my hand in front of her face and she didn't even respond. Maybe this is a really good part of "Cocoon". I don't know. The old people are acting young, is that the good part? I guess now that I have you all to myself there are a few things I've been wanting to talk about. All through college and in my post grad work I studied socioeconomic factors' correlation to international enmity, I even wrote my thesis on it, and I've put together a basic, three point plan to help move us towards world peace. First, we simply need to... sigh... Kat says, "OLD PEOPLE RULE!"
I give up. I'm going to turn on my ipod and pretend I'm typing. dkeiwoapkdfcnndie djdhsiuewhwioemcniwpqbbvmguheyqpghdsklaiejdhfnbcmwifhaksjheuvoakjehcbc
Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving,
Kat's Coadjutant a.k.a La Assistante
Comments
Old people driving: Ineffective
Old people trying to use the Self-check out: Ineffective
Old people and anything computers: Inneffective
Old people 'getting jiggy with it' (this is the wrong useage of the term, but the general populus can't get pass using this as a metaphor for dancing, so that is the reason i'm using the term in this way. Really, 'Jiggy' refers to the quality of dress [i.e. Dressing fly]): Ineffective
Old people in Starbucks: Ineffective
I think my point is made.